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Perceptions of Sexuality and Gender Relations Among the Igbo and Implications for the Reproductive Health of Men and Women : Selected Findings from Awka and Agulu, Anambra State, Nigeria

By Nkoli Ezumah

(Acknowledgement: To the John D and Catherine T MacArthur Foundation for funding this project under the Fund for Leadership Development Nigeria.)

Summary

This presentation focuses on selected findings from a study titled Promoting Healthy Sexuality and Gender Relations Among the Igbo through a Public Educational Programme: A Case Study of Awka (Urban) and Agulu (Rural) of Anambra State, Nigeria. The study had both a research component and an educational intervention programme. It investigated the perceptions, norms, attitudes and practices underlying sexuality and gender relations, and how they affected the reproductive health and rights of women in selected areas of South Eastern Nigeria.

The findings demonstrate that the Igbo perceptions of sexuality and gender relations are an integral part of their ideas about marriage, as well as their perception of acceptable male and female sexual behaviour prior to and within marriage. More specifically, some issues that pose serious threats to the attainment of reproductive health in men and women and the reproductive rights of women were identified. They include the following:
· There are no serious sanctions imposed on boys for indulging in pre-marital sex.
· Similarly, no serious sanctions are imposed on married men for establishing sexual liaisons.
· The practice of men having concubines is sustained.
· Parents who do not have male children sometimes encourage one of their unmarried daughters to procreate for the natal family in order to have a male child to perpetuate the lineage.
· Widows who desire to have additional children and women who are not able to achieve pregnancy with their husbands use this system as a means of meeting their need to procreate.
· Women were found to be powerless in handling marital infidelity by their husbands as a consequence of their low socio-economic status.
· Women are unable to assert their right to refuse sex with their husbands when they do not desire sex or feel it is not safe, due to fear of repercussions.

These issues arising from people's sexual behaviours, practices, beliefs and assumptions about male and female sexuality and gender relations show that the social construction of sexuality and gender relations are major deterrents to the attainment of women's reproductive health and rights. This study therefore emphasises the need to provide a public educational programme that will enable men and women make informed decisions about sexuality, marriage and child-bearing, and also encourage men to take responsibility for their sexual behaviour and the well-being of their partners.

1. Introduction

This presentation focuses on selected findings from a study called Promoting Healthy Sexuality and Gender Relations Among the Igbo Through a Public Educational Programme: A Case Study of Awka (urban) and Agulu (rural) of Anambra State, Nigeria.

Objectives

The objectives of the study were as follows:
· To examine the perceptions, practises and norms underlying sexuality and gender relations among the Igbo;
· To determine how these perceptions, practises and norms affect the reproductive health and rights of women;
· To undertake a public educational intervention programme to improve knowledge, practices and behaviour of people in the study area and beyond;
· To devise empowerment strategies to be used in order to promote women's reproductive health and rights.

Reproductive health is seen as "a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity, in all matters relating to the reproductive system and to its function and processes" (Germain and Kyte 1995). Following from this definition, reproductive rights include the right to make decisions concerning reproduction that are free of discrimination, coercion and violence. Sexuality, on the other hand, is an integral part of people's lives and refers to the expressions of sexual behaviour, including perceptions (beliefs, values, attitudes) and cultural practices that are associated with masculinity and femininity.

In spite of cultural diversities and emerging sexual identities, in many societies certain sexual norms lead to approval and disapproval of certain sexual practises. The system of marriage in any society greatly influences people's perception of sexuality before, within and after marriage. This is why marriage has been referred to as "a pole around which sexual culture is organised" (Carael 1995). This also explains why various societies have certain forms of sanction for dealing with any deviation from socially accepted sexual behaviour and gender roles. Gender roles are prescribed expectations about obligations, responsibilities and behaviours of males and females that are derived from cultural beliefs, values and attitudes. Consequently, notions about gender and gender roles are socially constructed through the process of socialisation. These gender roles therefore influence the ways men and women express their sexuality.

Justification

The critical health needs of women in Nigeria in the area of sexuality and gender relations concerning their reproductive health and rights have not received adequate attention in population policies and programmes. Reproductive health problems constitute about 60% of disease in Africa (Aitken and Reichenbach 1994). While some of these reproductive health problems arise from childbirth and the management of pregnancy, others are related to socio-cultural factors. Among these factors, sexuality and gender relations are of importance. Women's low socio-economic status and gender roles make them vulnerable to reproductive tract infections (RTIs) and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) (Adekunle and Ladipo 1992). Yet due to social stigma, women often do not seek medical treatment and therefore suffer in silence. This situation in turn aggravates disease complications (Olukoya 1996). Sexual violence (which occurs in the form of rape, wife battery and incest) also threatens women's psychological and physical well-being. Consequently, they are not able to exercise their reproductive rights in negotiating the nature, timing and frequency of sexual activities with their partners, or to protect themselves from unwanted pregnancies and diseases (Aral 1992). Moreover, cultural practices that promote the system of keeping concubines, indulgence in multiple sexual liaisons and the double standard of morality (which condones male but not female promiscuity) contribute to the spread of STDs and enhance the heterosexual transmission of HIV/Aids (Turshen 1991). The spread of HIV has been associated with deeply ingrained sexual behaviours. This is why it has been asserted that "in sub-Saharan Africa, the single most important risk factor for women is being married" (Moodie 2000). In addition, women's compliance with passivity in sexuality predisposes them to ignorance and misinformation about the sexual behaviour of their partners and the consequences of such actions (Gammage 1997). The above issues, which stem from people's sexual behaviours, attitudes, practices, beliefs and assumptions about male/female sexuality and gender roles, are major deterrents to the attainment of women's reproductive health and rights.

Although sexuality and particularly sexual behaviour are beginning to attract attention, there is a dearth of information on how sexuality and gender relations affect the reproductive health and empowerment of women in different cultural settings. Cubis (2000) has also emphasised the importance of studies on sexuality and gender relations, particularly in the effort to seek adequate responses to the HIV pandemic. She has aptly stated that "Education and condom distribution… cannot be considered an effective response unless gender issues have been taken into account. Generally the role of women in society makes it difficult for them to take protective measures." Research on sexuality and gender relations, the results of which will enable a better understanding of those perceptions, attitudes, norms, practices and assumptions that underlie sexuality and gender relations, was therefore undertaken. The findings will be used to design intervention programmes and strategies aimed at improving the reproductive health and rights of people in the study areas and even beyond.

Methodology

The study was carried out in Awka (an urban area) and Agulu (a rural area). Awka is a university town and the capital of Anambra State, Nigeria. Agulu is a rural community about 30 kms from Awka. Both communities are indigenously inhabited by Igbo-speaking peoples of Nigeria. The Igbo represent one of the three major ethnic group groups in Nigeria. (The other two are the Hausa and the Yoruba.) The major occupation of the Igbo in the rural areas is farming. Five communities, three in Awka and two in Agulu, were randomly selected for the study. The study was carried out using a combination of quantitative household survey and qualitative methods of focus group discussions (FGDs) and in-depth interviews (IDIs). The sample population for the household surveys was 1 000 persons. This comprised 600 respondents from Awka and 400 from Agulu. There were 423 males and 575 females. A ratio of 2:3 was used in the selection to ensure that women were well-represented in the study. Eighteen FGDs were undertaken. These comprised various groups of men and women, covering three age ranges: 15 - 24 years; 25 - 44 years; and 45 years and above. Each of the FGD groups had between 8 and 10 persons that were homogenously selected. There were 16 IDIs comprised of 8 men and 8 women. They included community leaders, farmers, retired public servants and a proprietor of schools.

2. Results and Discussion
2.1 Perceptions about appropriate age for marriage

Marriage among the Igbo is seen as a very important stage in the developmental cycle of men and women. Thus it is expected that upon attaining the appropriate age and having the means, one should be married. Respondent's perceptions about the appropriate age of marriage for boys and girls were investigated. It was found that 89% of the survey respondents felt that girls should be married between 18 and 29 years. On further probing, 76.3% said that the reason for their preference of this age group was to ensure that girls would be physically mature and would have acquired intellectual knowledge through education. This would enable them to face the challenges of marriage and to be able to give birth without complications (see Table 1a). Emphasising the need for maturing, a female community leader in an IDI at Agulu added "a girl needs to be mature enough to endure certain things she will come across as a married woman."

Where the ideal age for marriage by boys was concerned, 77.7% indicated that the suitable age was between 30 and 35 years. The main reason given by 94.3% of those who indicated this preference was that by this age, the man would have a good education or skill, which would provide him with regular employment. He should also be mature and financially capable of meeting his responsibilities to his wife, children and the society (Table 1b). However, a youth leader at Agulu in an IDI pointed out that there was no fixed age bracket, as it all depended on a man's capability. For him, once a man could fend for himself and also take care of his family, he should go ahead and get married. An important notion that ran through all these responses is that boys and girls or men and women are expected to get married at the appropriate time. Information on people's perception of unmarried persons was therefore sought.

Table 1a: Responses on appropriate age for girls to get married, by gender

Table 1b: Reasons for appropriate age for boys/men to get married, by gender

2.2 Perceptions of an unmarried person

Due to the fact that marriage is seen as a very important stage in people's life cycle, people's inability to get married when they are of age is perceived to be problematic. The vast majority - 91.0% - of the survey respondents said that an unmarried man is regarded as an irresponsible, hopeless and worthless person. In Igbo, he is called "Akalogoli." However, there were few respondents who indicated that a man could remain unmarried due to financial constraints, destiny or desire to be celibate like priests (see Tables 2a, 2b). These findings were reflected in the FGDs and IDIs at both Awka and Agulu. In the case of girls, marriage is seen as a very important state that must be attained. Right from infancy, a young girl is perceived in the light of the future role that she is expected to play as a wife. Thus names like "Unoaku" (house of money) or "Akpaego" (bag of money) are given to girls. These are references to the bride-wealth that the parents anticipate receiving from would-be in-laws when their daughters get married in the future. Indicating how marriage is seen as enhancing a girl's status. A female community leader at Awka aptly remarked that among the Igbo "The husband is perceived as a woman's source of prestige." Hence the Igbo expression: "di bu ugwu nwanyi." She went on to add, "If you were to move to the white man's land, an unmarried woman has no problems as long as she is able to sustain herself. Whereas in the Igbo land, such a person is not accorded due respect."

Information from the survey shows that 37.6% perceive an unmarried woman as an irresponsible person. However, 32.4% said that an unmarried woman might be unlucky or unfortunate in the marriage market. Such a person is referred to as "Asidi" (see Tables 3a, 3b). To buttress this point, a female community leader in an IDI at Agulu pointed out that an unmarried woman is seen to be unlucky because she cannot force a man to marry her. But if a woman remains unmarried because of her fastidious taste or promiscuous lifestyle, then society regards her as an irresponsible person. These points were also amplified in the FGDs. In addition, FGD participants pointed out that a woman may also remain unmarried because of bad character or destiny. Commenting on the new trend of single professional career women, a male community leader at Awka said in an IDI that some well-educated professional women and some wealthy women do not want to get married because they do not want to be under the authority of a man.

Table 2a: How society perceives an unmarried man, by gender

Table 2b: How society perceives an unmarried man, by marital status

Table 3a: How society regards an unmarried woman, by gender

Table 3b: How society regards an unmarried woman, by marital status

2.3 How a man demonstrates his manhood

In order to investigate the inter-relationship between Igbo people's perceptions of manhood, sexuality and gender relations, how a man demonstrates his manhood was examined. Perceptions about how a man demonstrates his manhood were found to be consistent throughout the FGDs and IDIs. The following yardsticks were identified:
· By getting married;
· Impregnating his wife and raising children;
· Fulfilling his obligations to his wife and children (meeting the needs of food, shelter, clothing, health care and protection and discipline);
· Meeting his obligation to the larger society (see Tables 4a, 4b).

Emphasising the importance attached to a man's position in the family, a community leader in an IDI at Agulu pointed out that "a man has to show he is the pillar of his family by struggling and taking care of his wife and children and meeting their needs." A female principal in an IDI at Awka, while highlighting the importance of a man's meeting the needs of his family, also indicated that "A man's capability is weighed through the wife's body. It should reflect on his wife and children, so that when they are seen passing, they will be recognised and he will be hailed as a wealthy and capable man."

Findings from the survey indicate that a man demonstrates his manhood in the following ways:

Table 4a: How a man demonstrates his manhood, by gender

Table 4b: How a man demonstrates his manhood, by marital status

2.4 How a wife shows she loves her husband

In order to better understand how people's notions of a wife affect gender relations between Igbo couples, how a wife shows that she loves her husband was investigated. Two main ideas emerged from the FGDS and IDIS about how a wife shows she loves her husband. These are:
· By respecting and caring for him; and
· By fulfilling her obligations to him, particularly by doing domestic chores, keeping the house clean and showing concern for his welfare.

In an IDI at Awka, a female community leader pointed out these perceptions when she remarked: "A woman should respect her husband. Like us that have 'bad mouth', you don't talk to your husband anyhow you see things. No, if he provokes you and you want to speak, remember that he is your husband. This shows love. Another, prepare his meals. These are what tell a man that his wife loves him."

However, a female participant at an FGD (25 - 44 years) at Awka gave an indication that the care demanded of the wife is not often reciprocated. She noted that "Even when the woman is caring for him, he will be caring for another person outside. But the woman will still continue trying, no matter the odds."

Responses from the survey reflect similar perceptions to those derived from FGDs and IDIs about how a woman shows she loves her husband. They are as follows:

There were no significant variations in these responses given by gender or marital status (see Tables 5a, 5b).

Table 5a: How a wife demonstrates she loves her husband, by gender

Table 5b: How a wife demonstrates she loves her husband, by marital status

2.5 Pre-marital sex for boys and girls

Traditionally, Igbo society upholds pre-marital chastity for both girls and boys. In many Nigerian cultures, a groom is expected to present gifts to his in-laws if he discovers on the day of his marriage that his bride is a virgin. On the other hand, if the bride is found to be unchaste, she loses the respect of her husband and his relations (Fadipe 1970). The data shows that 94.3% of the responses derived from the household surveys indicate that this society still frowns upon pre-marital sex for girls (see Tables 6a, 6b). The reasons for this stance are as follows:

Pre-marital sex is seen as an immoral act that results in unwanted pregnancy, abortion and sexually transmitted diseases 62.7%
It brings shame and tarnishes the image of the girl and that of her family 37.3%

It is significant that these responses cut across marital status and gender (see Tables 7a, 7b). Findings from the FGDs and IDIs also show the same pattern. Participants at the female FGD (45 years and above) at Agulu (rural) further indicated that girls who indulge in pre-marital sex are seen as wayward and irresponsible.

In the case of boys, 83.5% of the survey respondents said that society still frowns upon pre-marital sex for boys. The reasons they furnished are as follows (see Tables 8a, 8b):

It is an immoral act, since sexual intercourse is for married people (34%)
It leads to serious consequences such as unwanted pregnancies for girls and the spread of sexually transmitted diseases 30.2%
It may create a problem for boys who marry at a tender age 25.0%
Some boys could resort to stealing and other illegal activities in order to sustain their sexual escapades 10.8%

On the other hand, the reasons provided by those who said that society does not frown upon pre-marital sex for boys include the following:

It is nobody's business 24.5%
Boys do not get pregnant 26.5%
It is a test of manhood before boys get married 45.5%
Parents and older adults do not show better moral standards 3.5%

Supporting this trend of thinking, a male youth leader at Agulu said in one of the IDIs that "A young man who engages in pre-marital sex may likely be planning to choose his own wife, whereas a girl may just engage in a sexual jamboree without any marriage plans."

This kind of justification of male promiscuity is a reflection of the double standard of morality that exists in society. These reasons raise other critical issues: the fact that boys are presumed not to have any problems because they do not get pregnant indicates that exposure to HIV/Aids is not yet a source of concern. These perceptions cut across marital status and gender, indicating how pervasive they are (see Tables 9a, 9b). This also shows how deep-seated notions about masculinity are. Any effort to promote male responsibility in reproductive health must tackle the job of deconstructing some of these perceptions, which predispose men to risky sexual behaviours.

2.6 Sanctions

Views of respondents were sought on how the society tries to enforce these norms of pre-marital chastity for both girls and boys. Respondents indicated that certain sanctions are enforced, especially if the girl becomes pregnant.

She may be compelled to get married and could be disowned by her parents 38.4%
Some churches may refuse to grant her a church wedding 17.8%
She would be compelled to withdraw from school 5.6%
The community could impose some fine on her 38.2%

Information from FGDs of females of 45 years and above at Awka (urban) revealed that in the past, sanctions against a girl who became pregnant out of wedlock involved public disgrace. She was mocked by other girls of her age, who poured sand on her as a form of humiliation. Males in FGDs (24 - 44 years) at Agulu said that girls are fined. On the other hand, 66.4% of the respondents indicated that there are no serious sanctions for a boy who indulges in pre-marital sex, except that if he puts a girl in the family way, he could be compelled to marry her.

Information was gathered on whether there have been any changes in people's attitudes to pre-marital sex for boys and girls. Almost 40% of the respondents indicated that both positive and negative changes are occurring in people's perceptions of pre-marital sex. These are attributed to:

Impact of western culture, particularly the influence of films, television and videos 38.5%
The development of a sense of individualism which makes people insist on their right to enjoy themselves and to seek material goods without caring about public opinion 21.3%
Due to the influence of sex education, some are abstaining 40.2%

Highlighting the increase in pre-marital sexual freedom, a female in the FGD group of 25 - 44 years at Awka said that "In the olden days, boys and girls were virgins at marriage. But these days, from ages 12 - 13 they have started indulging in sexual intercourse." All the focus groups also noted that pre-marital sex is on the increase due to:
· the influence of video and films
· decline in parental control
· lack of good training for children at home
· immoral influence of peer groups, promiscuous parents and older adults
· quest for materialism
· decline in moral instruction in schools.

Changes have also been identified in the enforcement of sanctions. In an in-depth interview, a male teacher in Awka said: "These days, if a man puts a girl in the family way but the girl's family finds that he does not have bright prospects, they would not insist on his marrying their daughter. They would rather report him to the community for other forms of sanctions."

Table 6a: Whether people frown upon pre-marital sex for girls, by gender

Table 6b: Whether people frown upon pre-marital sex for girls, by marital status

Table 7a: Why people frown upon pre-marital sex for girls, by gender

Table 7b: Why people frown upon pre-marital sex for girls, by marital status

Table 8a: Why people frown upon pre-marital sex for boys, by gender

8b: Why people frown upon pre-marital sex for boys, by marital status

Table 9a: Reasons given by those who said society does not frown upon pre-marital sex for boys, by gender

Table 9b: Reasons given by those who said society does not frown upon pre-marital sex for boys, by marital status

2.7 Circumstances in which having children out of wedlock is supported

In spite of the observed societal abhorrence of pre-marital sex for girls, 62.8% of the survey responses indicated that there is a particular circumstance in which the society tolerates a woman having a child out of wedlock. If a family does not have a male child, one of their daughters might be encouraged to remain unmarried and bear a male child who will perpetuate the family line. Although this is assumed to fulfil a positive function, it has negative implications for the reproductive health of the woman. In a bid to get a male child for her family, a young woman may become a concubine, often to a man who is already married to one or two wives. In the process, she is exposed to the risks of STDs, including HIV/Aids, which are associated with participation in multiple sexual relationships. Reproductive tract infections (RTIs) have been identified as a serious health problem for women in urban and rural areas in Nigeria (Adekunde and Ladipo 1992).

2.8 Respondents' perceptions about a married man having lovers/concubines

Just over 95% of the respondents said that society frowns upon married men having outside lovers. Reasons for the opposition of this type of this sexual behaviour are as follows:

It gives rise to lots of marital problems, e.g., quarrelling when the wife gets to know about the relationship 69%
The husband may contract diseases which he may transmit to his wife 10.8%
It makes him neglect his responsibilities to his wife and children 16.0%
It is better to bring the woman in as a wife than to have her as an outside lover 4.2%

This concern that marital infidelity by husbands would give rise to marital problems, including neglect of the wife and children's needs cuts across marital status (see Table 10b). It was particularly emphasised by those separated and divorced, probably due to their own life experiences. The reasons provided by those who said that society does not frown upon married men having outside lovers are as follows:

Because the man is free to do what he likes 48.7%
It is supported if the wife does not meet her husband's sexual needs (especially when pregnant) 29.7%
It is a means of ensuring that the wife does not become pregnant 13.5%
It is not a problem if the lover is not a married woman 8.1%

It is important to note that 59% of females compared to 33.4% of males expressed the notion that "a man is free to do what he likes" (see Table 10a). This is an indication of internalisation of the norm of female passivity in sexuality, as well as an expression of women's powerlessness in challenging male promiscuity. Participants at the FGDs and IDIs in the rural and urban areas expressed divergent views about the perception of a married man who has an outside lover. A male youth leader (42 years) from Agulu felt this was an irresponsible action. He argued that a married man's involvement in extra-marital sexual relationships could be likened to "one carrying an elephant and at the same time using his feet to search for crickets." For him, if a man knows that one woman cannot satisfy his sexual needs, he should marry two or more wives, which is allowed by traditional notions of marriage. On the other hand, a male at the FGD (25 - 44 years) from Awka said that he did not think there was anything wrong having an outside lover. He asserted that since traditionally a man is allowed to have multiple wives, having lovers is a process of wife selection. He went on to say that his 95-year-old father had told him that concubines had always been in the society, even before he was born. Using the analogy that "variety is the spice of life", he argued that "a man can change from 'Egwusi' soup to 'Ogbonno' and to 'Nsala' soup without any problems." The idea he was trying to convey is that a man can switch female sexual partners without any problems. A female community leader in one of the IDIs at Awka corroborated society's tolerance of men's promiscuity by saying that a man is not defiled if he has an outside lover. She asserted that "In Igbo land, a man is always right. Even if he is having extra-marital relationships, it does not matter. As long as he takes care of his wife and children, people will not consider him to be erring. It is only when he starts neglecting his duty towards his wife and children that people will begin to frown at his behaviour."

The reasons given by those who feel that society tolerates men's extra-marital infidelity from the IDIs, FGDs and the survey, have serious implications for male responsibilities in reproductive health, as well as the need to meet the contraceptive needs of men and women in these communities. The argument that a man is free to do as he wishes and is not defiled by changing sexual partners is a reflection of the high degree of tolerance of male promiscuity, which is pervasive in the society. The problem with such perceptions is that they encourage men to indulge in multiple sexual liaisons. Engaging in multiple sexual liaisons is a known means of contracting and transmitting STDs and HIV/Aids in Nigeria (Soyinka 1998). The other popular explanation -- that a man's liaison with an outside lover is a way of ensuring that his wife does not get pregnant -- underscores the need for contraceptive information. Men and women in these communities need adequate information about various means of preventing unwanted pregnancies.

Table 10a: Reasons why society supports a married man having an outside lover, by gender

Table 10b: Reasons given by those who said the society does not support a married man having an outside lover, by marital status

2.9 Sanctions against a man for having an outside lover

Exactly 71% of the respondents reported that there are no sanctions imposed on a man for having an outside lover. A man is only seriously warned or cautioned if his lover is a married woman. Some FGD participants (25 - 44 years) at Awka affirmed this by saying that extra-marital sex by men is overlooked except if it involves a wife of a brother. A female FGD member at Agulu indicated that the reason why there is no sanction against a man is because people feel that a man is not defiled by his promiscuous lifestyle. A female community leader (45 years) in Awka noted that "There is no punishment for men. Men are free to do what they like and when they come back to the house, you have to welcome him. Rather it is the women who is punished if caught in adultery." This is why women (45 years and above) in an FGD at Agulu said that because nobody actually bothers when a man has outside lovers; the wife is usually advised to endure it and take solace in her children.

2.10 Wife's handling of marital infidelity by husband

The survey sought the opinions of respondents on what they felt a woman should do if she found out that her husband had an outside lover. The following views were expressed.

She feels bad and may discuss the matter with him 42.3%
May fall out of love with him, start quarrelling with him or fight the outside lover 26.2%
She may leave the husband (separate/divorce) 4.4%
She seeks assistance from family, in-laws, town union or church 21.0%
She does nothing and resigns herself to fate because of her powerlessness 3.0%
She tries to make herself more attractive in order to win over the husband's attention 1.5%
Don't know 1.5%

The need to seek assistance, which is higher among the two highest income levels (see Table 11b), points to the importance of economic independence for the attainment of female empowerment. Responses from the FGDs and IDIs about how women handle their husbands' infidelity are consistent and reflect the ideas generated from the surveys. They are as follows:

· The woman tries to plead with her husband to desist from those actions.
· She reports the issue to the husband's relations and friends, who are expected to admonish and advise him; she may also report to the priest.
· She tries to fight the outside lover.
· She tries to endure because she cannot do much, but keeps hoping that the situation might improve.
· She stops cooking for the man and when the situation becomes intolerable, she may return to her father's house until the husband comes to ask her to return.

There is no gender difference in these responses about how a woman handles marital infidelity on her husband's part (see Table 11a). This is a reflection of people's double standard of morality in dealing with issues related to sexuality.

Table 11a: Wife's handling of infidelity by husband, by gender

Table 11b: Wife's handling of infidelity by husband, by income (Naira: 20 Naira = 1 US$)

2.11 Respondents' perceptions about a married woman having an outside lover

The surveys show that 94% of the respondents indicated that society condemns the idea of a married woman having an outside lover. The reasons provided for this are as follows:

It is a mark of irresponsibility, an abomination and a disgrace to herself and her husband 64.1%
It is a bad influence on the children and she can also contract STDs 26.4%
It can result in domestic strife as well as unwanted pregnancies 9.5%
There are no gender differences in these views (see Table 12a). Similarly, participants in all the FGDs and IDIs indicated that a married woman who has an outside lover is regarded as an irresponsible person. Her action is equally perceived as an abomination and a defilement of womanhood and a bad example for her children. Even the mere discussion of this issue was disgusting to some elderly women and men in the FGDs (45+ years). Some of the women laughed in dismay and some frowned and hissed much of the time. A male community leader said that such an unfaithful married woman is regarded as "a prostitute of the first order." According to him, it is through such women that men contract STDs. In the same vein, a female principal in an IDI remarked that marital infidelity by women is perceived as a grave offence and that such women are referred to as "Ono nadi acho di." This implies that they are sexually insatiable. Highlighting the adverse effects a woman's infidelity could have on her children, a female FGD participant at Awka put it thus: "When a she-goat is eating cud, its younger ones are watching her."

2.12 Sanctions against a married woman who has an outside lover

Due to the fact that marital infidelity on the part of women is seen as a very grave offence, 72.3% of the survey respondents said that it attracts serious sanctions from the society. The husband initiates the sanctions with or without the collaboration of his kinsmen ("Umunna"), the wife's co-wives ("Umuokpu") and daughters of the family ("Umuada").

The following are the kinds of sanctions that are normally imposed on an unfaithful wife:

The husband might beat her and may send her away 56.7%
She is seriously warned, the husband may refuse to have sex with her and she is fined 11.2%
She is forced to make public confession of her guilt and make restitution, and is banned from preparing food for the husband until she makes the confession and restitution 30.2%
The husband may abandon her and take another wife 1.9%

It interesting to note that these responses cut across gender and income levels (see Tables 12b, 12c).

The most serious sanction imposed on a woman for marital infidelity is to compel her to make a public confession of her lover/lovers before the husband, his kinsmen, the co-wives and daughters of the family. At Awka, she is made to perform the "Nsa Ifi" ritual. This is a cleansing ceremony because her action is seen as a defilement of womanhood. She is obliged to present various items, including a cock or goat, to appease the gods for the atrocities and sacrilege she has committed. She has to sponsor the entire ceremony, whether she has the means to procure the required items or not. If she does not have the means, she explores various options, including selling some of her belongings or borrowing, in order to meet the demands. A male respondent at an FGD at Agulu reported that if the woman is pregnant, she must disclose who is responsible for the pregnancy before she delivers. Other participants added that difficult pregnancies for those who deliver at home are often attributed to adultery. Instead of seeking medical attention, the woman is urged to confess her infidelity. It is believed that her failure to make such a confession might result in the death of the baby and/or even herself. A female community leader at Agulu indicated that in the past, one of the ways that husbands tried to forestall marital infidelity by their wives was to put them under oath. It was assumed that the fear of repercussions as a result of breaking the oath was a deterrent.

However, since culture is dynamic, changes have been observed in contemporary society in how marital infidelity by women is handled. A male FGD participant (15-24 years) in Awka pointed out that in Igbo society, these sanctions are on the decline. Couples are devising new ways of resolving marital infidelity, and some resolve the matter privately. This is more likely to be the case as the society becomes more liberal. With greater mobility of men and women, the kinship-based form of social control is giving way to more individualistic approaches.

The FGDs and IDIs also point to the fact that the incidence of extra-marital relationships by women is on the increase due to the quest for materialism and also as a means of coping with the husband's infertility and the need for children by widows. Among the Igbo, procreation is regarded as the major objective of marriage. This is why 92.4% of the respondents held that a man proves his manhood by getting married, raising children, and providing for his family. Following from this expectation, a woman's major role is to procreate. Usually, a childless women is ridiculed and regarded as a failure, and is pestered by in-laws for not producing children. Consequently, some women who are unable to achieve pregnancy with their husbands resort to establishing outside relationships. A male community leader at Awka pointed out that this is a way that some women devise to handle infertility on the part of their husbands. According to him, what a woman in this situation does is "to take shelter". When she gets home, she will continue to have sexual intercourse with her husband. The idea is that when pregnancy occurs, it would appear that the husband is responsible for it.

The other reason that explains why some women establish outside sexual relationships is related to widows' interests in having children. In the past, widowhood inheritance among the Igbo had been a means through which young widows' sexual and reproductive needs were met by a close relative of the deceased husband. With Christianity and education, this practice is on the decline. However, the trend is now for a young widow who has one or few or no children to seek an outside lover so that she will be able to achieve her desired number of children. She is often encouraged to do so by her relations in order to prove that their daughter is capable of having children.

These avenues through which some women seek to deal with the need to have children have grave implications for their reproductive health. These practices, which predispose them to have multiple sexual partners or to be intimate with men who already have multiple sexual partners, make them vulnerable to STDs and HIV/Aids. In Nigeria, it has been shown that there is a dramatic increase in the rate at which HIV/Aids is spreading -- from 1.8% in 1990 to 5.4% in 1999. It has also been identified that seroprevalence is higher in women of child-bearing age (NASCP 1999).

Table 12a: Reasons why society frowns upon a wife having an outside lover, by gender

Table 12b: Sanctions on a wife who has an outside lover, by gender

Table 12c: Sanctions on a wife who has an outside lover, by income (Naira: 20 Naira = 1 US$)

2.13 Is it proper for a wife to refuse to have sex with her husband on occasion?

The propriety of wives refusing to have sex with their husbands was investigated. Nearly 82% of the survey respondents said this was acceptable. Those who expressed this view gave the following reasons:

If she knows that the husband is having extra-marital affairs or suspects he may have contracted STDs 10.4%
She may be sick, weak or pregnant 78.3%
Is unhappy, especially if the husband is not taking good care of her 7.0%
To avoid unwanted pregnancy 3.4%
Is fasting and meditating (see also Tables 13a,13b) .9%

Participants at the FGDs, both at Awka and Agulu, expressed divergent views on this issue. Their responses also demonstrated an intergenerational gap in their perceptions on the issue. Male and female FGDs (15 - 24 and 24 - 44 years) at Awka and Agulu were of the opinion that it was appropriate for a wife to refuse her husband sex if she was sick, wanted to avoid unwanted pregnancy, was weaning her baby or was unhappy with the husband. The other FGD groups of males and females (45 years and above) argued that it was inappropriate for a woman to refuse to have sex with her husband. In fact, women in the older groups felt that the question was absurd. They laughed, frowned and hissed to demonstrate how inappropriate the discussion was. Their opinion was that as long as a woman was of child-bearing age, she should not refuse to have sex with the husband. This reaction by the older men and women was not unexpected, considering the "culture of silence" which still characterises people's perception of sexuality.

Divergent views were also derived from the IDIs of opinion leaders. A female Christian leader at Agulu, a male youth leader at Agulu and a male teacher at Agulu all said that it was not right for a woman to refuse to have sex with the husband. All the other informants at the remaining IDIs at Agulu and those at Awka said this was acceptable, provided the woman had good reasons for her refusal.

Table 13a: Reasons why a wife should refuse to have sexual intercourse with her husband on occasion, by gender

Table 13b: Reasons why a wife should refuse to have sexual intercourse with her husband on occasion, by marital status

2.14 Likely consequences of a wife's refusal to have sex with her husband

Survey respondents identified the likely consequences of refusal of sex by a wife as follows:

The husband may be angry with her, beat her, reject her food, refuse to provide financial support for her 61.0%
He may start having extra-marital affairs 22.8%
He may force the wife to have sex with him 1.0%
He may report the woman to his family or hers or send her away 5.4%
He will do nothing 9.8%

There are no significant variations in options provided by respondents according to the gender and marital status (see Tables 14a, 14b).

Responses derived from the FGDs and IDIs followed the same pattern. They indicated that:
· fighting will occur, with the husband beating the wife;
· withholding of financial support by the husband;
· husband seeking an outside lover;
· husband suspecting that the wife may have an outside lover;
· husband deciding to take a second wife; and
· forcing the wife to have sex with him.

These responses reflect the persistence of inequality in gender-power relations regarding sexuality in these communities. They also demonstrate that fear of repercussions poses a serious threat to women's ability to exercise their right to negotiate sexual relationships with their spouses/partners. This corroborates the study (Aral 1992) which identified women's low social/economic status as one of the constraining factors that prevented them from being able to exercise their reproductive rights in negotiating the timing and nature of sexual activity with their partners and also protecting themselves against unwanted pregnancies. Moreover, lack of inter-spousal communication, which stems from the low social/economic status of women, was identified by a male informant in an Awka IDI as a major reason why women are not able to negotiate sexual relationships with husbands. According to him "if the husband and wife do not communicate freely or sit together to discuss issues, the women will be afraid or unable to express her opinion freely." These repercussions and the fear associated with them are manifestations of the unequal gender power relations that must be addressed if women are to attain their reproductive health and rights.

Table 14a: Likely consequences when a wife refuses to have sexual intercourse with her husband, by gender

Table 14b: Likely consequences when a wife refuses to have sexual intercourse with her husband, by marital status

2.15 Is it proper for a man to force his wife to have sex with him?

The majority of the survey respondents (95.3%) said it is not proper for a man to force his wife to have sex with him. The reasons they gave for saying no are as follows:

Because couples should not quarrel over such issues, the husband could wait for a convenient time, and forcing a wife to have sex amounts to rape and shows lack of love and concern 73.9%
It shows that the man is selfish and does not care about the feelings of his wife 11.3%
The man should learn to accommodate his wife's wishes and respect them 14.8%

The reasons given by those who said it is right for a man to force his wife to have sex with him are as follows:

The wife should be obedient to the husband in everything, including sexual relationships 13.1%
He did not marry her merely to admire her 8.8%
It is not for the woman to determine the frequency of sex with her husband .9%
By refusing, she is wicked .9%
Having sex is one of the objectives of marriage, so the wife must satisfy her husband at any time (see Tables 15a, 15b). 76.3%

According to the qualitative study, female FGDs (25 - 44) in Awka pointed out that the refusal of sex by wives is a bone of contention in many homes. That notwithstanding, a female community leader at Agulu pointed out that a man forcing his wife to have sex with him amounts to rape. It is important to observe that these perceptions are expressed by both married and unmarried persons.

It was also interesting to note that 83.1% females compared with 69.4% males said that since sex is one of the objectives of marriage "a wife must satisfy her husband at any time" (see Table 16a). This shows how entrenched some of these perceptions about sexuality and gender relations are. This is why concerted efforts to deconstruct some of these perceptions are crucial.

Table 15a: Reasons for saying that it is proper for a man to force his wife to have sex with him, by gender

Table 15b: Reasons for saying that it is proper for a man to force his wife to have sex with him, by marital status